Rob Brezsny's Astrology Newsletter http://ezezine.com
Rob Brezsny's Free Will Astrology Newsletter
"As a culture, we have wandered into a state of prolonged neurosis
because of the absence of a direct pipeline to the unconscious. As a
result, we have fallen victim to priestcraft of every conceivable sort."
-Terence McKenna
July 5, 2006
http://www.freewillastrology.com
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ROB'S UPCOMING PERFORMANCES
Oregon Country Fair
http://www.oregoncountryfair.org
near Eugene, Oregon
Friday, July 7, 3:20-3:50 pm: Main Stage + booksigning
Saturday, July 8, 1:10-1:50 pm: Stage Left
Sunday, July 9, 3:00-3:40 pm: Front Porch
Elliott Bay Bookstore
Seattle
Wednesday, July 12
6 p.m.
101 South Main Street
Seattle, Washington 98104
http://www.elliottbaybook.com
23rd Avenue Books
Portland
Thursday, July 13
7:30
1015 NW 23rd Avenue
Portland, OR 97210
http://www.23rdavebooks.com
Boulder Book Store
Wednesday, August 16
7:30
1107 Pearl Street
Boulder, CO 80302
http://www.boulderbookstore.com
Matter Bookstore
Thursday, August 17
7 p.m.
144 N. College Avenue
Fort Collins, CO 80524
http://www.wolverinefarmpublishing.org
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Here's an excerpt from my book
"PRONOIA IS THE ANTIDOTE FOR PARANOIA:
How the Whole World Is Conspiring to Shower You with Blessings"
available at http://snipurl.com/krjj
or find out more at http://www.freewillastrology.com
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YOUR LIFE WILL SUCK
If you choose to become a practitioner of pronoia, your life will suck. It
has to suck.
Let me explain. As you cultivate the arts of gathering and bestowing the
blessings that the universe is always conspiring to send your way, your
life will suck in the best senses of the word.
First, your life will suck in the same way that you use a straw to compel a
thick milk shake to disobey gravity and squirt into your mouth.
Metaphorical translation: You'll work hard to pull toward you the resources
you need, perhaps even exerting yourself with a force that goes against
the natural flow.
Your pronoiac life will suck in a second way: like a powerful vacuum
cleaner that inhales dirt from the floor and makes it disappear. You will
have a sixth sense about getting rid of messes that are contaminating
your clarity.
Here's a third interpretation: Once you commit yourself to the art of
pronoia, you will most likely develop an unusually dynamic form of
receptivity. Whether you're a man or woman, you'll be like a macho male
with a willful intention to be like a welcoming female. As a result, you'll be
regularly sucked into succulent opportunities you would never have come
upon if you had let your pop nihilistic conditioning continue to dominate
you. Your openness to uplifting adventures will make it easier for
serendipitous miracles to find you and draw you in.
Let's take one more poetic leap of faith as we meditate on the metaphor.
As you devote yourself to the art of making yourself available, your life
will suck in the way that movements of the mouth and lips and tongue
during close encounters with intimate partners stimulate pleasurable
feelings.
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To read other news and features from my book, go here:
http://snipurl.com/l9o3
or
http://freewillastrology.com/beauty/beauty.main145.shtml
To buy the book, use the links to Amazon.com and Barnes and Noble,
which are on my homepage at http://www.freewillastrology.com
Or cut and paste the direct links below:
AMAZON
http://snipurl.com/krjj
BARNES & NOBLE
http://snipurl.com/krjn
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OTHER PRONOIA RESOURCES:
VIDEO
Terence McKenna
2-minute burst of truth
http://snipurl.com/s90k
MAGAZINE
*Plenty* magazine
http://www.plentymag.com
WEBSITE
Shift in Action
http://www.shiftinaction.com
MUSIC
Michael Franti and Spearhead
http://www.spearheadvibrations.com/index.html
(Note: I endorse these because I like them. They're not advertisements,
and I get no kickbacks.)
Please tell me your own personal nominations for PRONOIA RESOURCES.
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FREE WILL ASTROLOGY
Week beginning July 6
Copyright 2006 by Rob Brezsny
http://www.freewillastrology.com
Grammar key: Asterisks equal *italics*
ARIES (March 21-April 19): Three years before Dan Brown's *The Da Vinci
Code* came out, my book *The Televisionary Oracle* was published. In it,
I riffed extensively on Mary Magdalene's role as Jesus's consort,
collaborator, and co-creator of Christianity--similar in ways to Brown's
themes. Sales of my tome are approaching 10,000, while Brown's have
topped 61 million. Why the contrast? His work is a linear detective story,
while mine is an experimental blend of magical realism, prophetic
philosophy, and oracular poetry. His characterizations and plot hew to
established conventions of mainstream fiction, while mine spring from my
muse and real life. The difference between our approaches is comparable
to the choice you have ahead of you, Aries. You can opt for greater
popularity and loyalty to convention, or you can choose to be more of a
secret as you rigorously follow the promptings of your inner voice.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20): *Once you open a can of worms, the only way
to re-can the buggers is to use a larger can.* So says Zymurgy's First Law
of Evolving Systems Dynamics. I urge you to keep that in mind during the
coming week, Taurus. You or someone close to you may suffer from a
blissful mania or temporary insanity that leads them to think that
liberating the canned worms is a wise idea. Maybe it will ultimately prove
to be the right thing to do, but it could cause a ruckus in the short run. In
any case, make it your job to have a barrel-size can on hand for the re-
containment.
GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Recently a team of a thousand workers spent a
week scraping off 600,000 wads of chewing gum that had become
bonded to the surface of Beijing's Tiananmen Square. If you choose to
accept it, Gemini, your assignment in the coming week is to carry out a
procedure comparable to China's massive, intricate effort to wipe the
slate clean. It may be time-consuming and a bit excruciating--the
equivalent of shuffling around for hours on your hands and knees--but in
retrospect I think you'll be very glad you did it. Its surprisingly cathartic
effect will make you smarter and wilder and kinder and trickier.
CANCER (June 21-July 22): This will be an excellent time--maybe one of
the best weeks ever--to try herding cats, coaxing hermits to do karaoke,
and getting anorexics to eat veggie burgers with all the fixings. In other
words, Cancerian, the once-inconceivable may become likely. The
adventures you swore you would never have the courage to attempt are
suddenly within your capacity. You can at least partially dissolve the one
fear you've always believed would hobble you forever.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): According to the Bible, the apostle Thomas did
not immediately accept the other disciples' reports that Christ had
survived his crucifixion and come back to life in a resurrected body.
"Unless I see the nail marks in his hands and put my finger where the nails
were, and put my hand into his side," Thomas said, "I will not believe it."
Later Christ appeared in person to Thomas and invited him to put his
hand in the actual wound. Moral of the story: The person who doubted
was given a special privilege. Let that be your guiding thought in the
coming week, Leo. Demand proof. Seek actual evidence to bolster your
faith.
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MID-YEAR PREVIEW OF YOUR DESTINY
In addition to hearing my fresh batch of Expanded Audio Horoscopes for
the coming week, you can listen to my long-term look at your destiny for
the coming four and a half months.
For Web access:
1. Go to http://snipurl.com/krjm
2. Click on your sign
3. If you want to hear this week's Expanded Audio Horoscope, click on the
link that says:
"Hear This Week's Horoscope (07/04/2006 - 07/10/2006)"
4. Or if you want to hear your long-term forecast, click on the link that
says:
"2 Weeks Ago (06/20/2006 - 06/26/2006)"
The Expanded Audio horoscopes cost $6 apiece if you access them on
the Web via RealAudio. Discounts are available for multiple purchases.
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VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): July 4, 1776 is generally regarded as the day
the 13 American colonies issued the Declaration of Independence, thereby
asserting their right to be free of Britain's rule. But the fact is that only
two members of the Continental Congress signed the document on that
day. Most of the other 54 men waited until August 2. In a similar way,
Virgo, a process you thought was fully climaxed this week will not reach
its full ripening until early August. I suggest you reserve making your final
conclusions until then.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Your patron saint for the month of July is
Dublin professor James Mays. A few years ago he made a major splash in
the literary world. While researching the work of Libran poet Samuel
Taylor Coleridge (1772-1834), Mays discovered 300 previously unknown
poems written by the co-founder of England's Romantic Movement,
doubling what had long been thought to be his total output. I predict that
in the coming weeks, Libra, you too will make a breakthrough that will
give you access to a fresh trove of creative resources that have been
hidden from your view.
SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Like a bird, you seem to have the ability to
defy gravity lately. You're acting with the expansiveness that comes from
having a wide-ranging, high-in-the-sky view of life. Sometimes you remind
me of a thunderbird, which among Native Americans was a mythical
raptor that carried messages between spiritual beings. Its eyes unleashed
lightning and its enormous wings beat so hard that they spawned storms.
But sometimes, Scorpio, you're more like a nightingale--a small, graceful
songbird that sings beautiful, complicated songs at night when no other
bird is singing. Congratulations on your versatility. Only you could pull off
being half-thunderbird and half-nightingale.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): A garbage strike turned out to be a
lucky break for two people in Illinois. Brother and sister Ezekiel and Karen
Garnett had bought a lottery ticket but then carelessly thrown it out.
Many days later they heard that the winning $10.5 million ticket remained
unclaimed. Was it theirs? They sifted through two weeks' worth of trash,
which remained uncollected outside their house because sanitation
engineers had walked off the job. Voila! They found the precious ticket.
Now I predict you'll be visited by a comparable sequence, Sagittarius--a
glitch that leads to a happy ending. It may be that an asset you've
neglected or squandered will return to you because of an inconvenience.
Or perhaps you'll realize how valuable a certain experience is only after
you've lost it, whereupon you'll recover it against all odds.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): If you usually wear your baseball cap
backwards, this will be a favorable time to turn the peak toward the front.
If it's normally facing forward, I suggest you turn it around. In fact,
everything you try in the coming week will have extra luck and grace if
you approach it a bit askew or do it the reverse of your customary habit.
The cosmic tables have turned, and the best way to capitalize is to flip-
flop yourself.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Iran made a strong overture of peace to the
United States in the spring of 2003. According to *The Washington Post,*
the Iranians offered to recognize Israel, promised to stop supporting
terrorist groups, and asked for diplomatic talks concerning their nuclear
technology. Tragically, the Bush administration ignored the proposal,
missing a chance to cool down tensions that have led to today's crisis. My
analysis of the astrological omens suggests that you now have a
comparable window of opportunity in your personal life, Aquarius. Peace
feelers are appearing. You'll soon have a fresh opportunity to dissipate
simmering stress before it erupts into conflict. Even better, you'll be in a
good position to negotiate pretty favorable terms for yourself. Don't
imitate Bush and company.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): If I'm reading the astrological omens
correctly, this would be an excellent time for you to apply for a job as a
crocodile trainer, audition for a supporting role in a TV soap opera, or give
motivational speeches to five-year-olds. For that matter, it wouldn't be
outlandish for you to use a chainsaw to create sculptures from dead
trees, make a home video of yourself entitled "The Dancing Chef" or "The
Wise-Ass Guru," or write a research paper on orca whales and quantum
physics. In other words, Pisces, consider trying things you've never
considered before. Ask yourself if maybe you possess hidden talents that
you haven't even begun to cultivate. Be receptive to the possibility that
your destiny is more open-ended than you've ever imagined.
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HOMEWORK:
Say "I love you" at least 20 times a day for the next seven days. Report
your results by going to at http://www.freewillastrology.com and clicking
on "Email Rob."
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WANT TO GET YOUR CHART DONE?
I'm not doing charts these days. In addition to writing my weekly column
and expanded audio horoscopes, I'm also working on a CD and promoting
my new book.
But I can recommend a colleague whose astro-aesthetics closely match
my own. She's RO LOUGHRAN.
Ro utilizes a blend of well-trained intuition, emotional warmth, and a high
degree of technical proficiency in horoscope interpretation; she is skilled
at exploring the mysteries of your life's purpose and nurturing your
connection with your own inner wisdom.
Ro is based in California, but can do phone consultations and otherwise
work with you regardless of geographic boundaries.
Ro's website is at
http://www.yoursouljourney.com/
She can also be reached at roloughran@comcast.net
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I totally respect your privacy. I'll never sell or give away your address to
anyone.
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Contents of the Free Will Astrology Newsletter are Copyright
2006 Rob Brezsny
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