Rob Brezsny's Astrology Newsletter September 30, 2015

 Rob Brezsny's Astrology Newsletter
 September 30, 2015
 FreeWillAstrology.com

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My book PRONOIA IS THE ANTIDOTE FOR PARANOIA
is available at Amazon: bit.ly/Pronoia
or Powells: bit.ly/PronoiaPowells

Below are excerpts.

Bless your appetite. May it be voracious and unapologetic.

Much respect for your buried needs and secret yearnings. May they flow into plain view for you to embrace and celebrate.

Congratulations for your willingness to name the unspeakable truths and acknowledge the embarrassing fears. May you be willing to rebel against your self-image for the sake of gaining access to deeper reserves of power and competence.

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You came into this world as a radiant bundle of exuberant riddles. You slipped into this dimension as a shimmering burst of spiral hallelujahs. You splashed into this realm as a lush explosion of ecstatic gratitude. And it is your birthright to fulfill those promises.

I'm not pandering to your egotism when I tell you these things. When I urge you to "Be yourself," I don't mean you should be the self that is greedy to win every argument and stockpile a heap of garish treasures and believe in the absolute truth of every hostile, paranoid thought your monkey mind comes up with.

When I say, "Be yourself," I mean the self that says "Thank you!" to the wild irises and the windy rain and the people who grow your food. I mean the rebel creator who's longing to make this entire planet your precious home and protected sanctuary. I mean the dissident bodhisattva who is joyfully struggling to germinate the seeds of divine love that are packed inside every moment.

When I say, "Be yourself," I mean the spiritual freedom fighter who is bustling and finagling and conspiring to relieve your fellow messiahs of their suffering as you shower them with rowdy blessings.

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Change yourself in the way you want everyone else to change

Love your enemies in case your friends turn out to be jerks

Avoid thinking about winning the lottery while making love

Brainwash yourself before someone nasty beats you to it

Confess big secrets to people who aren't very interested

Write a love letter to your evil twin during a lunar eclipse

Fool the tricky red beasts guarding the Wheels of Time

Locate the master codex and add erudite graffiti to it

Sell celebrity sperm on the home shopping channel

Dream up wilder, wetter, more interesting problems

Change your name every day for a thousand days

Kill the apocalypse and annihilate Armageddon

Exaggerate your flaws till they turn into virtues

Brag about what you can't do and don't have

Get a vanity license plate that reads KZMYAZ

Bow down to the greatest mystery you know

Make fun of people who make fun of people

See how far you can spit a mouthful of beer

Pick blackberries naked in the pouring rain

Scare yourself with how beautiful you are

Simulate global warming into your pants

Stage a slow-motion water balloon fight

Pretend your wounds are exotic tattoos

Sing anarchist lullabies to lesbian trees

Plunge butcher knives into accordions

Commit a crime that breaks no laws

Sip the tears of someone you love

Build a plush orphanage in Minsk

Feel sorry for a devious lawyer

Rebel against your horoscope

Give yourself another chance

Write your autohagiography

Play games with no rules

Teach animals to dance

Trick your nightmares

Relax and go deeper

Dream like stones

Mock your fears

Drink the sun

Fuck gravity

Sing love

Be mojo

Do jigs

Ask id

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"You have more freedom than you are using," says artist Dan Attoe.

I hope that taunt gets under your skin and riles you up. Maybe it will motivate you to lay claim to all the potential spaciousness and independence and leeway that are just lying around going to waste.

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MORE PRONOIA RESOURCES:

The case for climate change optimism. Is this the year humans finally got serious about saving themselves from themselves?
tinyurl.com/o7ufow5

McDonald's announced that it will stop using eggs from caged hens in the U.S. and Canada.
tinyurl.com/qbta8ky

Mozambique is now free of landmines. The African country has removed its last known landmine after two decades of work to get rid of the explosives.
tinyurl.com/ntsd7rz

(Note: I endorse these because I like them. They are not advertisements, and I get no kickbacks.)

Please tell me your own personal nominations for PRONOIA RESOURCES.

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FREE WILL ASTROLOGY
 Week beginning October 1

Copyright 2015 by Rob Brezsny
FreeWillAstrology.com

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22):

The 20th century's most influential artist may have been Pablo Picasso. He created thousands of paintings, and was still churning them out when he was 91 years old. A journalist asked him which one was his favorite. "The next one," he said. I suggest you adopt a similar attitude in the coming weeks, Libra. What you did in the past is irrelevant. You should neither depend on nor be weighed down by anything that has come before. For now, all that matters are the accomplishments and adventures that lie ahead of you.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21):

A windbreak is a line of stout trees or thick bushes that provides shelter from the wind. I think you need a metaphorical version: someone or something to shield you from a relentless force that has been putting pressure on you; a buffer zone or protected haven where you can take refuge from a stressful barrage that has been hampering your ability to act with clarity and grace. Do you know what you will have to do to get it? Here's your battle cry: "I need sanctuary! I deserve sanctuary!"

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21):

Your fellow Sagittarian Walt Disney accomplished a lot. He was a pioneer in the art of animation and made movies that won numerous Academy Awards. He built theme parks, created an entertainment empire, and amassed fantastic wealth. Why was he so successful? In part because he had high standards, worked hard, and harbored an obsessive devotion to his quirky vision. If you aspire to cultivate any of those qualities, now is a favorable time to raise your mastery to the next level. Disney had one other trait you might consider working on: He liked to play the game of life by his own rules. For example, his favorite breakfast was doughnuts dipped in Scotch whisky. What would be your equivalent?

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19):

October is Fix the Fundamentals Month. It will be a favorable time to substitute good habits for bad habits. You will attract lucky breaks and practical blessings as you work to transform overwrought compulsions into rigorous passions. You will thrive as you seek to discover the holy yearning that's hidden at the root of devitalizing addictions. To get started, instigate free-wheeling experiments that will propel you out of your sticky rut and in the direction of a percolating groove.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18):

Have you made your travel plans yet? Have you plotted your escape? I hope you will hightail it to a festive playground where some of your inhibitions will shrink, or else journey to a holy spot where your spiritual yearnings will ripen. What would be even better is if you made a pilgrimage to a place that satisfied both of those agendas -- filled up your senses with novel enticements and fed your hunger for transcendent insights. Off you go, Aquarius! Why aren't you already on your way? If you can't manage a real getaway in the near future, please at least stage a jailbreak for your imagination.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20):

Pablo Neruda's Book of Questions consists entirely of 316 questions. It's one of those rare texts that makes no assertions and draws no conclusions. In this spirit, and in honor of the sphinx-like phase you're now passing through, I offer you six pertinent riddles: 1. What is the most important thing you have never done? 2. How could you play a joke on your fears? 3. Identify the people in your life who have made you real to yourself. 4. Name a good old thing you would have to give up in order to get a great new thing. 5. What's the one feeling you want to feel more than any other in the next three years?. 6. What inspires you to love?

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PLEASURE IS HOLY?

Assume that your drive to experience pleasure isn't a barrier to your spiritual growth, but is in fact essential to it. Proceed on the hypothesis that cultivating joy can make you a more ethical and compassionate person. Imagine that feeling good has something important to teach you every day.

For inspiration in practicing this approach, tune in to your EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES. They're four-to-five-minute meditations on the current state of your destiny.

To listen to your Expanded Audio Horoscope online, go to RealAstrology.com.

Register and/or log in through the main page.

You can also listen over the phone by calling 1-877-873-4888.

The cost is $6 per sign on the Web (discounts available for bulk purchases), or $1.99 per minute by phone.

The Expanded Audio Horoscopes work on most smart phones and tablets.

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"Your expanded astrology thingees help me remember who I really am." -Gareth N., Toronto

"I never knew it was possible to get my butt kicked and my head patted at the same time -- until I listened to you, Rob." -Kristi P., Portland, OR

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ARIES (March 21-April 19):

The next seven weeks will NOT be a favorable time to fool around with psychic vampires and charismatic jerks. I recommend you avoid the following mistakes, as well: failing to protect the wounded areas of your psyche; demanding perfection from those you care about; and trying to fulfill questionable desires that have led you astray in the past. Now I'll name some positive actions you'd be wise to consider: hunting for skillful healers who can relieve your angst and aches; favoring the companionship of people who are empathetic and emotionally intelligent; and getting educated about how to build the kind of intimacy you can thrive on.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20):

You may have seen websites that offer practical tips on how to improve your mastery of life's little details. They tell you how to de-clutter your home, or how to keep baked goods from going stale, or why you should shop for shoes at night to get the best fit. I recently come across a humorous site that provides the opposite: bad life tips. For instance, it suggests that you make job interviews less stressful by only applying for jobs you don't want. Put your laptop in cold water to prevent overheating. To save time, brush your teeth while you eat. In the two sets of examples I've just given, it's easy to tell the difference between which tips are trustworthy and which aren't. But in the coming days, you might find it more challenging to distinguish between the good advice and bad advice you'll receive. Be very discerning.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20):

On a windy afternoon last spring I was walking through a quiet neighborhood in Berkeley. In one yard there was a garden plot filled with the young green stems of as-yet unidentifiable plants. Anchored in their midst was a small handwritten sign. Its message seemed to be directed not at passers-by like me but at the sprouts themselves. "Grow faster, you little bastards!" the sign said -- as if the blooming things might be bullied into ripening. I hope you're smart enough not to make similar demands on yourself and those you care about, Gemini. It's not even necessary. I suspect that everything in your life will just naturally grow with vigor in the coming weeks.

CANCER (June 21-July 22):

"I am rooted, but I flow," wrote Virginia Woolf in her novel The Waves. That paradoxical image reminds me of you right now. You are as grounded as a tree and as fluid as a river. Your foundation is deep and strong, even as you are resilient in your ability to adapt to changing circumstances. This is your birthright as a Cancerian! Enjoy and use the blessings it confers. (P.S. If for some strange reason you're not experiencing an exquisite version of what I've described, there must be some obstacle you are mistakenly tolerating. Get rid of it.)

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22):

I offer my congratulations? You have corralled a gorgeous mess of problems that are more interesting and provocative than everyone else's. It's unclear how long this odd good fortune will last, however. So I suggest you act decisively to take maximum advantage of the opportunities that your dilemmas have cracked open. If anyone can turn the heartache of misplaced energy into practical wisdom, you can. If anyone can harness chaos to drum up new assets, it's you. Is it possible to be both cunning and conscientious, both strategic and ethical? For you right now, I think it is.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22):

Let's say you have walked along the same path or driven down the same road a thousand times. Then, one day, as you repeat your familiar route, a certain object or scene snags your attention for the first time. Maybe it's a small fountain or a statue of the Buddhist goddess Guanyin or a wall with graffiti that says "Crap happens, but so does magic." It has always been there. You've been subconsciously aware of it. But at this moment, for unknown reasons, it finally arrives in your conscious mind. I believe this is an apt metaphor for your life in the next week. More than once, you will suddenly tune in to facts, situations, or influences that had previously been invisible to you. That's a good thing! But it might initially bring a jolt.

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HOMEWORK:

Send testimonies about how you've redeemed the dark side to: Sex Laugh, uaregod@comcast.net.

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Submissions sent to the Free Will Astrology Weekly Newsletter or in response to "homework assignments" may be published in a variety of formats at Rob Brezsny's discretion, including but not limited to newsletters, books, the Free Will Astrology column, and Free Will Astrology website. We reserve the right to edit such submissions for length, style, and content. Requests for anonymity will be honored with submissions; otherwise, reader names, screen names, or initials will be used. Please be sure to note your preference when sending to us. We are not responsible for unsolicited submission of any creative material.

Contents of the Free Will Astrology Newsletter are Copyright 2015 Rob Brezsny

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