Rob Brezsny's Astrology Newsletter
OCTOBER 17, 2012
FreeWillAstrology.com
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My book THE TELEVISIONARY ORACLE has been reprinted:
bit.ly/Televisionary
See the spectacular cover: bit.ly/yHbHHF
Here's what it's about: bit.ly/xpMhTz
Read the first four chapters here: bit.ly/y6br6D
Here's what novelist Tom Robbins said after reading the book:
"I've seen the future of American literature and its name
is Rob Brezsny."
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Here's how the book begins:
Welcome to the Televisionary Oracle
Coming to you on location from your repressed memory of paradise
Reminding you that you can have anything you want if you'll just
ask for it in an unselfish tone of voice
Programmed to prevent the global genocide of the imagination
Hi, beauty and truth fans, and welcome to The Most Secret Spectacle
on Earth, brought to you by Beauty and Truth, Inc. and Twenty-Two
Minutes of World Orgasm.
We're your hosts with the Holy Ghost grins, and we're proud to
announce that this is a perfect moment. This is a perfect moment
because you, my beloved friends and teachers, have taken the first
step in a ritual that could lead to the end of your amnesia.
At this perfect moment you have somehow managed, by fabulous
accident or blind luck or ingenious tricks, to tune in to the
Televisionary Oracle -- proving that you're ready to recover your
repressed memories of your sublime origins, and know again the
Thirteen Perfect Secrets from Before the Beginning of Time.
Welcome to the end of your nightmares! The world is young, your
soul is free, and a naked celebrity is dying to talk to you about
your most intimate secrets right now!
Just kidding. In actuality, the world is young, your soul is
free, and at any moment you'll begin to feel horny for salamanders,
clouds, toasters, oak trees -- and even the ocean itself!
Whoever you think you are, whatever friendly monsters you've
tried to make into your gods and goddesses, whatever media viruses
you might have invited into your most private sanctuaries-you
can decide right now that your turning point has arrived. You
can decide that you're ready to change your lives ... and change
your signs ... and change your changing. Because when you tuned
in the Televisionary Oracle, you tuned into your own purified,
glorified, unified, and mystifying self.
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Steal a song from the soundtrack for THE TELEVISIONARY ORACLE:
bit.ly/zTDeZl
In a crisis we cut away
what we don't need anymore
In the good times we fight our way
We fight our way inside
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Steal another song from the soundtrack for THE TELEVISIONARY
ORACLE:
bit.ly/w5Ido8
When your brain becomes a dumping ground
for hundreds of little slogans and jingles . . .
When everyone in the world seems to be
thinking their thoughts inside your head . . .
When your mind's so crammed with useless facts
that you can't even feel your own feelings . . .
It's time to fight back and say
"Get outta my head!"
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MORE PRONOIA RESOURCES:
LET'S NOTICE WHAT WORKS AS MUCH AS WE NOTICE WHAT DOESN'T WORK
Instead of cataloging only what is going wrong, the International
Union for the Conservation of Nature will now also track and reward
successful efforts to conserve species and their environments.
tinyurl.com/93r9qte
THERE ARE MORE THINGS IN HEAVEN AND EARTH THAN ARE DREAMT OF
IN YOUR PHILOSOPHY
Man who supposedly needed a heart transplant miraculously cures
his own heart
tinyurl.com/cddxeb6
YOUR MINIMUM DAILY REQUIREMENT OF BEAUTY
Tulip fields in the Netherlands
i.imgur.com/C0eTn.jpg
(Note: I endorse these because I like them. They are not advertisements,
and I get no kickbacks.)
Please tell me your own personal nominations for PRONOIA RESOURCES.
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FREE WILL ASTROLOGY
Week beginning October 18
Copyright 2012 by Rob Brezsny
FreeWillAstrology.com
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22):
Visualize yourself heading out on a high adventure with interesting
people -- but all the while being distracted by the memory of
a trivial insult you experienced earlier that day. Picture yourself
getting intimate with a lover who inspires you to lose your self-consciousness
-- up until the point when you decide to interrupt your fun by
answering a phone call from some random person. Imagine toning
yourself down and holding yourself back because of misplaced politeness
or unnecessary guilt or delusional fear -- even though you're
feeling a rushing instinct to surge and soar and overflow. Finally,
Libra, understand that in getting you to envision these parodies
of your current inclinations, I'm hoping to shock you into making
sure that nothing like them happens.
SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21):
Sometime soon you may dream of being naked at a public event
like a class at school or a committee meeting. I think this would
be an excellent omen, so I hope it comes to pass. It would signify
that you're ready to shed the disguises that have been making
it problematical for you to reinvent yourself. Who is the New
You? Stripping down to the bare essentials in your dreams will
help you see raw truths about your waking life.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21):
As you cross the great water in search of the unknown treasure,
navigate by the light of the clouds. That's your dreamy oracle,
Sagittarius. What does it mean? Well, the work you do to figure
it out is essential to activating its potential, so I don't want
to give away too much. But here are three further hints to inspire
you on your quest. 1. Be willing to go a long way to find a secret
you don't even know you're looking for. 2. Consider the possibility
of cultivating faith in a goal that you don't quite yet grasp
in its entirety. 3. Rely on shadows and reflections to give you
accurate information you can't get directly from the thing that's
casting shadows and being reflected.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19):
Everyone has some kind of power. What's yours? In the coming
days, I suspect there will be some crisis and opportunity regarding
how you use it. Maybe you will be invited to assume more authority
or exercise greater influence. Maybe your ability to wield your
particular clout will be questioned or doubted, and you will be
challenged to either stand up and express it with more integrity
and purpose, or else relinquish it. For best results, take a moment
right now to visualize the precise power you would love to command.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18):
"Dear Rob: I really enjoy reading your horoscopes. You
feel like a friend I've never met. When I try to picture what
you're like, I keep getting a vision of you as being fat, short,
and bald with a strawberry blond moustache. Am I right? - Curious
Aquarius." Dear Curious: It's great that you've decided to
do a reality check. This is an excellent time for all you Aquarians
to see if what you imagine to be true is a match for the world
as it actually is. To answer your question, I am in fact tall
and thin, don't wear a moustache, and have an abundance of long
silver hair.
PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20):
I've got just the right message to set the tone for you in the
weeks ahead. It comes from writer H.P. Lovecraft, and captures
the essence of your astrological omens. "Pleasure to me is
wonder," said Lovecraft. "It's the unexplored, the unexpected,
the thing that is hidden and the changeless thing that lurks behind
superficial mutability. To trace the remote in the immediate;
the eternal in the ephemeral; the past in the present; the infinite
in the finite; these are to me the springs of delight and beauty."
Now get out there, Pisces, and gather up all the mysterious marvels
you have coming to you -- all the bracing encounters with uncanny
grace.
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YOU'VE ALWAYS GOT MORE HELP AVAILABLE THAN YOU IMAGINE
What do you want to be when you grow up? Is it possible that
you will eventually develop beautiful capacities and sublime understandings
that you can't even imagine right now?
I might be able to help you move in the direction of becoming
more of the person you were born to be.
Tune in to my EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES
Find out more at RealAstrology.com.
The audio horoscopes are also available by phone at 1-877-873-4888.
"The best part about your audio horoscopes is that they
pat me on the head and kick me in the ass at the same time."
- Rita L., San Diego
"Your audio oracles go beyond helping me find the truth
-- they inspire me to find the WILD truth."
- Patrick K., Montreal
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ARIES (March 21-April 19):
When Spanish conquistador Francisco Pizarro laid waste to Peru
in 1532, his soldiers found green stones on the land. Were they
emeralds? A priest who was traveling with them gave them bad advice.
He said that the way to determine whether they were merely colored
glass or else precious gems was to test their hardness by pounding
them with hammers. In this manner, many actual emeralds were shattered
into fragments. Learn from this mistake, Aries. Make sure you
recognize treasures for what they are. And don't force them to
submit to unwise tests that misconstrue their true nature.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20):
Someone at Reddit.com posted a question to the community: Could
anyone help him recreate the aroma of the Pirates of the Caribbean
ride at Disneyland? He said he loved that smell. It was a blend
of damp earth, rotting wood, and gunpowder. It had musty overtones,
a hint of chlorine, and a tantalizing freshness. If only he could
get that fragrance to permeate his house, he testified, he'd always
be able to work at peak efficiency. You might want to follow his
lead, Taurus. It's a good time to identify and gather all the
ingredients you would need to make sure your environment inspires
you to the max.
GEMINI (May 21-June 20):
If you asked me to be your personal advisor, I would prescribe
supplements and herbs to build up your immune system. I'd insist
that you eat nothing but healthy food and get at least eight hours
of sleep every night. I'd suggest that you meditate daily on images
that symbolize your most inspiring desires. For fun, I might even
advise you to do a ritual in which you create a big circle around
yourself using violet yarn and then do a series of playful acts
to pump up your freedom, like dancing as wildly as you know how
and chanting "love is my creator." Finally, Gemini,
if you sought my counsel, I'd urge you to use your exuberant imagination
in concert with your disciplined intellect as you design a long-term
plan to charge up your well-being.
CANCER (June 21-July 22):
"Dear Free Will Astrologer: I found your website by accident
today and was drawn in fast and hard. No matter what I did I could
not escape and get back to my work. Your messages were too interesting
for my own good. You gave me too many answers to questions I've
had for too many years. I felt like I was being cured of problems
I didn't even know I had. Many hours went by until finally I was
able to pull myself out of the vortex. How did this happen? -
Freaked Out." Dear Freaked: I was born under the sign of
Cancer the Crab, and it so happens that the people of my tribe
are currently emanating an intriguing and inscrutable aura. We're
at the peak of our ability to attract and seduce. Many of us are
using our power benevolently, but our mysterious mojo could still
be a bit unsettling.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22):
The past is headed your way bearing gifts, Leo. I recommend
that you make yourself available for its blessings, which may
be delivered to you in unexpected ways. For example: The spirit
of a dead loved one could impart an enigmatic but useful tip in
the middle of the night. An abandoned dream you assumed was gone
forever might return from limbo to grant you a wish. A favor you
did for someone long ago could finally be repaid. Are you ready
to let history reward you in its own unique style?
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22):
Just for you, it is Shark Week. During this dicey holiday, you
should be wary of all sharks, especially the kind that look like
human beings. Don't get in their way, and don't underestimate
them. On the other hand, I'm not opposed to you getting to know
some sharks better. They could teach you some valuable lessons
on how to get what you want. Not that you would ever be as cold-blooded
and predatory as they are, of course. But it might be energizing
to your ambitions if you add just a bit of shark-like thinking
to your repertoire.
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HOMEWORK:
Tell a story about the time Spirit reached down and altered your
course in one tricky, manic swoop. Go to Freewillastrology.com
and click on "Email Rob."
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Contents of the Free Will Astrology Newsletter are Copyright
2012 Rob Brezsny
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