Rob Brezsny's Astrology Newsletter February 1, 2012

Rob Brezsny's Astrology Newsletter
FEBRUARY 1, 2012
FreeWillAstrology.com

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My book PRONOIA IS THE ANTIDOTE FOR PARANOIA
is available at Amazon: bit.ly/Pronoia
or Powells: bit.ly/PronoiaPowells

Below is an excerpt.
(See it as it is in the book: bit.ly/AjXdGQ)

LUMINOUS TEASE

Change yourself in the way you want everyone else to change
Love your enemies in case your friends turn out to be jerks
Avoid thinking about winning the lottery while making love
Brainwash yourself before someone nasty beats you to it
Confess big secrets to people who aren't very interested
Write a love letter to your evil twin during a lunar eclipse
Fool the tricky red beasts guarding the Wheels of Time
Locate the master codex and add erudite graffiti to it
Dream up wilder, wetter, more interesting problems
Change your name every day for a thousand days
Exaggerate your flaws till they turn into virtues
Kill the apocalypse and annihilate Armageddon
Brag about what you can't do and don't have
Get a vanity license plate that reads KZMYAZ
Bow down to the greatest mystery you know
Make fun of people who make fun of people
See how far you can spit a mouthful of beer
Pick blackberries naked in the pouring rain
Scare yourself with how beautiful you are
Simulate global warming into your pants
Stage a slow-motion water balloon fight
Pretend your wounds are exotic tattoos
Sing anarchist lullabies to lesbian trees
Plunge butcher knives into accordions
Commit a crime that breaks no laws
Sip the tears of someone you love
Build a plush orphanage in Minsk
Feel sorry for a devious lawyer
Rebel against your horoscope
Give yourself another chance
Write your autohagiography
Play games with no rules
Teach animals to dance
Trick your nightmares
Relax and go deeper
Dream like stones
Mock your fears
Drink the sun
Sing love
Be mojo
Do jigs
Ask id

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Are you in quest of an Intimate Ally? A Soul Friend? A Wild Confidante?

Check out Match.com via Free Will Astrology's link: bit.ly/SoulMatch

Look for a Co-Pilot, Co-Conspirator, or Collaborator . . . an Agent to represent you or a Disciple to worship you . . . a Secret Sharer who'll listen better than anyone or an Amazing Accomplice with whom you can practice the Art of Liberation.

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MORE PRONOIA RESOURCES:

THE PROBLEMS THAT COME FROM SHRINKING CRIME
Netherlands to close prisons for lack of criminals
tinyurl.com/7e2evyv

SOMETIMES PRONOIA IS LIKE PETTING A SHARK ON ITS SNOUT
Even sharks can be beautiful
tinyurl.com/7sf9p5b

THE BECKONING OF LOVELY WISHES
Take a photo of yourself closing your eyes and making a wish, then upload it to this flickr page: tinyurl.com/764rgrd

(Note: I endorse these because I like them. They are not advertisements, and I get no kickbacks.)

Please tell me your own personal nominations for PRONOIA RESOURCES.

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FREE WILL ASTROLOGY
Week beginning February 2

Copyright 2012 by Rob Brezsny
FreeWillAstrology.com

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18):

If you go to California's Yosemite National Park this month, you might get the chance to witness a reddish gold waterfall. Here's how: At sunset, gaze up at the sheer east face of the rock formation known as El Capitan. There you will see what seems to be a vertical river of fire, also known as Horsetail Fall. I nominate this marvel to be your inspirational symbol for the coming weeks. According to my reading of the astrological omens, you will have the power to blend fire and water in novel ways. I encourage you to look at the photo here -- bit.ly/fluidicfire -- and imprint the image on your mind's eye. It will help unleash the subconscious forces you'll need to pull off your own natural wonder.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20):

After singer Amy Winehouse died, actor Russell Brand asked the public and media to scale back their derisive opinions about her struggle with intoxicants. Addiction isn't a romantic affectation or glamorous self-indulgence that people are too lazy to overcome, he said. It's a disease. Would you mock a schizophrenic for his "stupid" propensity for hearing voices? Would you ridicule a victim of multiple sclerosis for not being vigorous? I'm of the opinion that all of us have at least one addiction, although it may not be as disabling as Winehouse's weakness for liquor and narcotics. What's yours, Pisces? Porn? Sugar? Internet? Bad relationships? The coming weeks would be a very good time to seek help in healing it.

ARIES (March 21-April 19):

Sad but true: A lot of people seem to be perpetually in a state of wanting what they don't have and not wanting what they actually do have. I'm begging you not to be like that in the coming weeks, Aries. Please? I'll tell you why: More than I've seen in a long time, you will have everything going for you if you want precisely what you do have -- and are not full of longing for what's unavailable. Do you think you can you manage that brilliant trick? If so, you will be amazed by the sublimity of the peace that will settle over you.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20):

Of all the signs of the zodiac, Tauruses are the least likely to be arrogant. Sadly, in a related development, they're also among the most likely to have low self-esteem. But your tribe now has an excellent opportunity to address the latter problem. Current cosmic rhythms are inviting you rather loudly and dramatically to boost your confidence, even at the risk of you careening into the forbidden realm of arrogance. That's why I recommend Taurus musician Trent Reznor as your role model. He has no problem summoning feelings of self-worth. As evidence, here's what he confessed when asked about whether he frequents music social networks: "I don't care what my friends are listening to. Because I'm cooler than they are."

GEMINI (May 21-June 20):

"If Mark Twain had had Twitter," says humorist Andy Borowitz, "he would have been amazing at it. But he probably wouldn't have gotten around to writing Huckleberry Finn." I think you're facing a comparable choice, Gemini. You can either get a lot of little things done that will serve your short-term aims, or else you can at least partially withdraw from the day-to-day give-and-take so as to devote yourself with more focus to a long-range goal. I'm not here to tell you which way to go; I just want to make sure you know the nature of the decision before you.

CANCER (June 21-July 22):

You now have a special talent for helping your allies tap into their dormant potentials and latent energy. If you choose to use it, you will also have a knack for snapping lost sheep and fallen angels out of their wasteful trances. There's a third kind of magic you have in abundance right now, Cancerian, and that's the ability to coax concealed truths out of their hiding places. Personally, I'm hopeful that you will make lavish use of these gifts. I should mention, however, that some people may resist you. The transformations you could conceivably set in motion with your superpowers might seem alarming to them. So I suggest that you hang out as much as possible with change-lovers who like the strong medicine you have to offer.

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EXPLORING THE BIG PICTURE OF YOUR LONG-RANGE FUTURE

Dear Readers,

In late December and early January, I wrote a series of long-term, big-picture horoscopes for you. Now I've gathered them together in one place. Go here to read them: bit.ly/BigLife

In addition to these, I created EXPANDED AUDIO HOROSCOPES that go even further in exploring your destiny in 2012. Each report in the three-part series is 7-9 minutes long. Unlike the written freebies, the three-part audio reports cost money. Sign in and access them here: RealAstrology.com

A new audio forecast for this week is also available at the same place.

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LEO (July 23-Aug. 22):

"Publishing a volume of poetry is like dropping a rose petal down the Grand Canyon and waiting for the echo," said author Don Marquis, speaking from experience. Something you're considering, Leo, may seem to fit that description, too. It's a project or action or gift that you'd feel good about offering, but you also wonder whether it will generate the same buzz as that rose petal floating down into the Grand Canyon. Here's what I think: To the degree that you shed your attachment to making an impact, you will make the exact impact that matters most. Give yourself without any expectations.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22):

Comedian Louis CK told a story about his young daughter. She had a fever, and he gave her some Tylenol that was bubble gum flavored. "Ewwww!" she complained. Louis was exasperated. "You can't say 'ewwww,'" he told her. What he meant was that as a white kid in America, she's among the most privileged characters in the world -- certainly far luckier than all the poor children who have no medicine at all, let alone medicine that tastes like candy. I'm going to present a similar argument to you, Virgo. In the large scheme of things, your suffering right now is small. Try to keep your attention on your blessings rather than your discomfort.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22):

I stumbled upon an engineering textbook for undergraduates. There was a section on how to do technical writing, as opposed to the literary kind. It quoted a poem by Edgar Allan Poe: "Helen, thy beauty is to me / Like those Nicean barks of yore / That gently, o'er a perfumed sea, / The weary way-worn wanderer bore / To his own native shore." Then the book gave advice to the student: "To express these ideas in technical writing, we would simply say, 'He thinks Helen is beautiful.'" Don't take shortcuts like that, Libra. For the sake of your emotional health and spiritual integrity, you can't see or treat the world anything like what a technical writer would.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21):

Are you ready to start playing in earnest with that riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma? Are you looking forward to the rough and tumble fun that will ensue after you leap into the middle of that sucker and start trying to decipher its impossibly interesting meaning? I hope you are primed and eager, Scorpio. I hope you can't wait to try to answer the question that seems to have no answer. Be brave and adventurous, my friend -- and be intent on having a blast.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21):

Lessons could come to you from unforeseen sources and unanticipated directions during the next few weeks, Sagittarius. They will also come in expected forms from all the familiar influences, so the sum total of your learning could be pretty spectacular. To take maximum advantage of the opportunity, just assume that everyone and everything might have useful teachings for you -- even people you usually ignore and situations that have bored you in the past. Act like an eager student who's hungry for knowledge and curious to fill in the gaps in your education.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19):

"The consuming desire of most human beings is deliberately to plant their whole life in the hands of some other person," said British writer Quentin Crisp. If you harbor even a small tendency in that direction, Capricorn, I hope that in the coming days you will make a concentrated effort to talk yourself out of it. In my astrological opinion, this is a critical moment in the long-term evolution of your healthy self-sufficiency. For both your own sake and the sake of the people you love, you must find a way to shrink your urge to make them responsible for your well-being.

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HOMEWORK:

What have you been saving yourself up for? Do you have a prediction about when the time will come when what you've been saving yourself up for will finally arrive? testify at Truthrooster@gmail.com

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Submissions sent to the Free Will Astrology Weekly Newsletter or in response to "homework assignments" may be published in a variety of formats at Rob Brezsny's discretion, including but not limited to newsletters, books, the Free Will Astrology column, and Free Will Astrology website. We reserve the right to edit such submissions for length, style, and content. Requests for anonymity will be honored with submissions; otherwise, reader names, screen names, or initials will be used. Please be sure to note your preference when sending to us. We are not responsible for unsolicited submission of any creative material.

Contents of the Free Will Astrology Newsletter are Copyright 2012 Rob Brezsny

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